


hearts like thunder

by clawsnbeak



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: (adam accidentally injures himself), Adam Parrish Loves Ronan Lynch, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Mild Blood, Night Terrors, Protective Ronan Lynch, Ronan Lynch Loves Adam Parrish, Ronan Lynch is Bad at Feelings, Sharing a Bed, Thunder and Lightning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-04
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2020-07-31 10:08:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20113372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clawsnbeak/pseuds/clawsnbeak
Summary: “Start, you piece of fucking shit,” Ronan yelled, slamming the BMW’s dashboard in frustration.“In my professional opinion,” Adam deadpans. “That’s not how you start a car.”Ronan and Adam break down in the middle of the road during a thunderstorm. Of course, when they finally get to a motel, there is only one bed. Also features: soft boys, nightmares, and a lot of cuddles.





	hearts like thunder

**Author's Note:**

> Big thank you to [octoberfeeling](https://archiveofourown.org/users/octoberfeeling/pseuds/octoberfeeling) for beta-ing this one-shot and being so kind about it!

“Start, you piece of fucking shit,” Ronan yelled, slamming the BMW’s dashboard in frustration.

“In my professional opinion,” Adam deadpans. “That’s not how you start a car.”

Ronan glared at him, but it lacked heat. It had been weeks since Ronan managed his signature Ronan glare. The one everybody knew, whether they knew  _ him _ or not. It was the glare Ronan gave to most of the Aglionby student body, slow-walkers, drivers passing him by on the high roads. The glare Ronan had reserved for the maggot when she hadn’t crawled under his skin yet. The glare Ronan gave Adam during one of their many fights. Now, he felt the edges of his eyes soften, not quite managing to keep the otherwise hidden fondness out of them. 

Adam pretended not to notice.

“If you’re such a professional mechanic, then go out there,” Ronan nodded his head at the windshield through which they could see the heavy rain obscuring the road in front of them. “And fix the damn car.”

Adam was never someone who rose quickly to the bait. Not when Tad Carruthers asked him what he had done during summer break, knowing that he had been working every day instead of tanning in Cancun like the others had. Not when Kavinsky and his posse repeated “trailer trash” over and over until Adam wanted to deafen his other ear as well. But there was something about Ronan baiting him that he couldn’t resist. He stared at him challenging before he resolutely opened the car door and stepped out.

Adam immediately felt drenched, his clothes sticking to him like a second skin. The cold wind was rushing through his clothes, leaving him shivering. He motioned at Ronan to open the hood and raised it with shaking hands, securing it after a few clumsy tries.

The inside of the BMW was a mess. There was a motor with nothing attached to it, some oil dripping down the pipes which would have blown the car to pieces if it wasn’t dreamt up. Adam wasn’t willing to give up, though, so he tinkered around and tried to concentrate on what he learned from his job as a mechanic. But the storm was getting heavier and Adam’s teeth clattered hard enough for him to worry about future dentist appointments.

He closed the hood with a hard bang and rushed back into the safety of Ronan’s car. Ronan looked at him triumphantly, which turned into poorly hidden concern when he saw Adam shiver. He wordlessly turned up the heat and avoided Adam’s questioning eyes by looking out the windshield. 

The windshield wipers were on their highest setting, the noise somewhat soothing, but it didn’t help with the pouring rain which left the world in a blurry state.

“There’s a motel not far from here,” Ronan said suddenly, pushing his phone into Adam’s hands. Google Maps was opened and a route had already been calculated. It was a 10 minute walk which would undoubtedly still be too much in the poor weather, but at least it was something. 

Adam shrugged and handed back the phone. “It’s not like we have another choice.” He wanted to get out of his wet clothes and just sleep. Adam was lucky he traded his early morning shift for a longer afternoon one. 

They paused for a second, neither of them willing to get out of the car. Adam could hear the rain pounding on the roof and he wondered what it would sound like if he could hear it with two ears. 

Ronan looked at him like he knew what he was thinking but said nothing. Instead, he moved his hands to the car door and motioned for Adam to do the same. They counted down in their heads and opened the door at the same time, both instantly regretting every choice they had ever made that led them to this moment.

Adam for one, regretted, not for the first time tonight, sacrificing himself to Cabeswater. The forest had woken him up at 1 am with a heavy feeling in his stomach. Something that screamed “something is wrong!” and Adam hadn’t been able to go back to sleep, as much as he had tried. Reluctantly, he had woken Ronan who was asleep on the floor next to him, something that had been occurring more often than not these days.

They had driven out to Cabeswater, the night still clear and quiet. Adam had directed Ronan to which rocks had to be moved and they went to work. It wasn’t a big job, this time, and they had walked out of Cabeswater a half hour later.

The minute they stepped inside the car, the sky broke open and Adam’s intuition told him this wasn’t going to end well. But they had no choice but to drive out and see how far they could go. Apparently, that had been a quarter into the drive home until the car broke down and here they were, walking in the pouring rain with pneumonia in their futures.

Before they left, Ronan had taken a backpack out of the trunk of his car, claiming that they were necessary supplies which Adam translated to probably alcohol. He hoped there were at least a few clothing items in there or Adam was going to have an incredibly hard time tonight.

Worry clawed at his chest at the prospect of him actually getting sick and possibly missing work because of it. He couldn’t miss one cent of his monthly income, let alone the many hours he would have to trade for lying in bed with the flu.

It took them longer than ten minutes to get to the motel. It was something inevitable as the heavy rainfall didn’t allow them to see anything but basic outlines of nearby trees and the headlights of a truck racing down the road. 

By the time they stood at the front desk, they were both soaking wet and less than amused.

The lady behind it looked at them with something akin to pity in her eyes. “We’re pretty full for the night boys.”

Adam suppressed a heavy sigh. He felt Ronan’s body grow stiff next to him and prayed he wouldn’t do something stupid, like letting the anger and frustration he was undoubtetly feeling get to him which would probably result in him threatening the poor lady and them getting kicked out back into the cold. Adam quickly gave the woman his best smile, before Ronan could do just that, and asked her kindly if she was sure there was nothing available for just one night.

“We do have a queen left,” she said after a few seconds of searching. “But I’m not sure if you want-”

“We’ll take it,” Ronan said abruptly, pointedly not looking at Adam. Little did he know that Adam would’ve said yes as well. Anything to get dry and maybe have a decent night’s sleep. It wasn’t as if they had a better choice either. They couldn’t exactly walk home, which would’ve taken a while even with a car and they couldn’t walk back to Ronan’s BMW because then it would all have been for nothing.

Adam longed for some warmth, something that made him less focused on the storm surrounding them. 

He had never liked storms. The booming sounds as they crashed through the sky had always reminded him of his father’s fists slamming down on him. Now that he was out of the trailer, it felt as if he reacted even worse to them than he had before. As if his body couldn’t let go of the memories he had so deeply stowed away and instead brought them up more often than it had ever done before.

Adam followed Ronan up the stairs wordlessly and helped him look for their room, giving a silent “thank you” in his head to whatever god or being was listening.

The motel room was a bit dusty and the lights didn’t do much for the darkness of the room, but it was dry and the bed, which was pushed against a small strip of wall, didn’t look too uncomfortable. Adam eyed the yellowing wallpaper and the chair shoved underneath a flimsy desk that looked like it was going to fall apart any minute and realised with a sharp sadness that this was the nicest room he had ever slept in. 

Ronan threw his backpack on the small couch next to the bed. “I’ll sleep here.”

“No,” Adam told simply, letting his thin and outworn jacket glide off his shoulders. His brandless sneakers were sloshing with water. Adam made a face despite himself.

“The fuck do you mean “no”?” Ronan said, the anger and frustration from before seeping into his words. “I’m telling you, Parrish. Not asking.”

“And  _ I’m  _ telling  _ you  _ that you’re not sleeping on the couch, Lynch.” Adam’s own patience was starting to wear thin. He wasn’t in the mood for pointless discussions, he just wanted some dry clothes and endless sleep.

Despite his own frustration, Adam tried for a different approach and let Ronan, for once, see the defeat in his eyes. “The bed is big enough, let’s just share it, okay?”

Ronan raised his eyebrows a fraction but otherwise didn’t react. Adam saw it as a win and felt the fight leave his body. He watched as Ronan reached for his backpack and wordlessly threw him a soft piece of clothing; a t-shirt that was unquestionably Ronan’s but Adam didn’t recognise.

“I’m not gonna sleep in a wet bed,” Ronan mumbled and stepped into the bathroom, leaving Adam standing in the middle of the room with a shirt that smelled strongly of Ronan’s cologne and a restless mind that kept wondering why Adam liked that so much.

-

Ronan felt his heart race at the thought of sharing a bed with Adam tonight. It probably shouldn’t have bothered him as much as it did, since he was often sleeping on the floor next to Adam’s mattress, a meager thing that barely lifted Adam’s body off the ground. He probably slept closer to Adam on a regular basis than he would tonight, but the implications of it made his body tremble.

He didn’t take too long in the shower, knowing Adam probably needed it more than he, a strong and healthy person, did. He would’ve given Adam his time in the bathroom first if he hadn’t felt like exploding right then and there. He had stashed away one pair of sweatpants and a shirt that was a little oversized, even on him, so he had given Adam the shirt and kept the sweatpants for himself as he often slept without a shirt on anyway. Sleeping next to Adam, in the same bed, without a shirt on, though, was not something he was willing to think about now.

Ronan stepped out of the bathroom and motioned for Adam to get in, who darted passed him with a flush on his cheeks. 

_ Weird. _

He heard the shower turn on and looked around the room. It was an ugly room, definitely not up to the standard of the hotel rooms he had stayed in during his lifetime. Even the rooms he used to share with Declan when they were still young and best friends were bigger than this one. Ronan immediately felt cramped and isolated, a feeling he counteracted with pacing around the room. He needed to release the pent up energy that was building into his body, something he couldn’t keep contained on a regular basis, let alone in this situation he had gotten himself into. 

The shower turned off and Ronan barely had time to sit down on the bed and look as nonchalant as possible before the bathroom door opened and Adam walked out.

_ Oh. _

Adam was wearing nothing but his boxers and Ronan’s shirt which hung off his body indecently. The neck of Ronan’s shirt was too big for Adam’s lean body and hung off his shoulder instead, revealing a splash of freckles that etched themselves into Ronan’s long term memory.

_ Fuck _ .

Adam looked sheepish but squared his shoulders like he was preparing for battle and turned off the lights resolutely, leaving them in nothing but darkness and shadows. Ronan could just make out Adam’s form, which was slightly illuminated by the window next to him, and squeezed his eyes shut for a second trying to talk himself into not fleeing.

He stiffly willed his body to move and laid down underneath the scratchy covers of the shitty motel bed, his back turned to the other end. Ronan felt the bed dip as Adam sat down on it for a mere second before he started moving as well. Even though there were a few inches of space between them, Ronan felt like it wasn’t enough. He could still hear Adam’s breathing, though it was sometimes drowned out by the heavy storm outside. He could still feel Adam’s warmth radiating into his own body and did everything in his power to not move closer and absorb it fully.

“Goodnight,” he heard Adam whisper, his breathing already slowing down. Ronan turned his head for a second and watched as Adam’s eyes fell closed.

“Night, Parrish,” he said just as softly and closed his eyes.

Ronan was rudely awakened by someone kicking him hard in the ankle. It took him a few seconds before he realised where he was and who was kicking him.

“The bed is big enough,” Ronan said mockingly while he turned around sharply to curse Adam for waking him. That’s when he heard the screaming.

“Please,” Adam begged in his sleep, propelling Ronan into motion. He quickly turned on the bed table light and took in Adam’s tear-stained face. His delicate features were contorted into a frown of pain, his fists were clenched next to him. Adam had pushed himself fully against the wall next to his side of the bed.

“No, please,” Adam begged again, trashing his body around violently. 

“Parrish,” Ronan said as gently as he could in the moment. Seeing Adam this way, begging and crying, felt like taking a knife to the heart. It hurt him in ways he couldn’t fully comprehend but he wanted it to stop, for both him and for Adam.

Adam turned around suddenly and sharply, pounding his fist against the wall in one fast motion that Ronan couldn’t stop. He punched the wall again, leaving blood streaks behind on the yellowing wallpaper. 

Ronan quickly took Adam’s forearms and pulled his back onto his own chest, holding Adam as he thrashed around. He abruptly became aware of the amount of strength Adam’s body held. It was difficult to keep him still without hurting him but Ronan managed until his body finally stopped moving. 

  
Adam was shaking in his arms and Ronan had to swallow away the lump that lodged itself in his throat. Adam’s sobs were still audible over the raging storm and the pleadings became a whisper.

“Adam?” Ronan asked, trying to make no sudden movements as he turned Adam around. He had to look at him and make sure he was okay. Adam was slowly blinking his eyes open, filling themselves with tears the longer he looked at Ronan.

“Fuck,” Adam swore and moved away, shielding his face away from Ronan with his hands. Ronan’s eyes latched onto the bloody and bruising skin of Adam’s knuckles. His hand shook when he reached for him.

“It’s okay,” he said gently. A loud crack of thunder shook the room and Adam flinched at the sound, jumping closer to Ronan.

Ronan decided that this was not the time to hold back in his affections towards Adam as he had done so many times now over the months he had known him. Adam needed someone to be there for him and his forged aloofness wasn’t going to help.

He laid a hand across Adam’s shoulders, keeping his touch gentle but firm. “Talk to me.”

Adam hesitated but shook his head eventually. Ronan hadn’t expected anything different from Adam, the person who perceives himself as unknowable, not realising people wanted to try. That he wanted to know Adam, every part of him. He didn’t say that, though. Instead, he stood from the bed and tried to locate his backpack which had an emergency kit in it that Gansey had insisted on. He couldn’t be more thankful for that now.

Ronan laid the kit down on the bed and gently took Adam’s injured hand. Adam’s eyes widened as he saw the mess he had made of his hand and winced as if he had just started feeling the pain.

After inspecting the wound, Ronan realised it was still bleeding, little droplets of blood running down Adam’s arm in a poor imitation of the veins underneath it. 

“C’mere,” he told Adam but Adam was staring at his hand numbly, not indicating that he heard Ronan in the first place. Ronan put a hand on Adam’s back and pushed him softly, keeping his hand there once Adam was standing, just in case. Ronan took him to the bathroom and turned on the light which hurt his eyes from the brightness of it. Once Ronan had blinked away the glare, he could see Adam properly and his heart stopped in his chest. Adam’s face was pale and blotchy red in some places, his freckles barely visible. Adam was shaking from where he sat on the toilet seat, his eyes vacant as he looked up to Ronan. 

Ronan ignored the way his chest contracted painfully and took Adam’s biceps in his hands, guiding him over to the sink. He carefully brought Adam’s hand to the faucet he had turned on and let it run next to the wound, so Adam wouldn’t feel too much pain of the direct stream of water. He cleansed the area with a bit of antibacterial soap he had found by luck in one of the cabinets and dried it off with some paper towels.

Adam seemed to wake up out of his daze a little when they started moving back towards the bedroom. Ronan rolled the gauze around his knuckles with practised ease and secured it, not letting go of Adam’s hand yet.

“It’s the storm,” Adam finally told him, his eyes on the window behind Ronan. “It reminds me of…”

Ronan didn’t push him, he didn’t need to. Adam collapsed in on himself and Ronan took him into his arms without thinking about it. He guided them on the bed until his back hit the wall behind them and wrapped his arms around Adam more tightly as he sobbed into his chest.

Adam would definitely be embarrassed about it later, Ronan knew that, he would have probably preferred it if Ronan hadn’t seen any of it. But he had and he couldn’t leave Adam like this, he couldn’t leave him to deal with this on his own.

So, Ronan waited and made soothing noises. He ran his hands through Adam’s hair and ignored the warmth he felt shoot up his body as Adam’s breathing slowed the more he played with the auburn strands.

“My father,” Adam started, his voice gravelly. Ronan resisted the urge to clench his fists in anger. “The storm reminds me of my father.”

“Fuck, Adam.”

“I think that’s why I had that nightmare,” Adam said, playing with his bandaged hand. “I didn’t hit you did I?”   
  


Ronan’s heart split in two at the unmistakable hint of fear in his voice. “No, you didn’t,” Ronan reassured him. “You wouldn’t.”   
  


Ronan felt Adam shrug, but the shaking of his hands betrayed his feigned casualness. Ronan titled Adam’s chin up gently, so he had to look him in the eyes and listen to what he had to say.

“You,” Ronan said fiercely, “are not your father.”

Adam’s bottom lip began to wobble dangerously but his eyes held a certain kind of understanding, a sense of trust Ronan didn’t know he could put there.

“You don’t lie,” Adam said shakily, staring at Ronan with an intensity he felt burning through his very soul. 

“I don’t lie,” Ronan affirmed and pushed himself further down the bed until he was lying on his back, Adam’s head nestled in the crook of his neck. They fell asleep like that, moments later. 

When the next storm rolled around a couple of weeks later, they were lying in the exact same position, this time in St. Agnes, where Ronan had been sleeping often enough to say he moved in. They had exchanged lazy kisses for the better part of the night before Adam’s eyes were threatening to close and Ronan moved them into their favourite sleeping position; Adam’s face buried in his neck and their legs entwined.

Ronan felt Adam’s breath even out and swiftly followed him, knowing there was a chance Adam would be plagued by nightmares again, but this time he was prepared. The nightmares didn’t stop once they got together because that’s not what happens in real life as much as Ronan wished it did. But since that one fateful night, Adam didn’t have to go through them alone anymore and that was enough.

**Author's Note:**

> You can also find me on [tumblr](clawsnbeak.tumblr.com)


End file.
